hello aini

we’ll end in happiness. friends or not. =]

didn’t meet. just a simple phone call.

7! 7!! hahaha. lucky number 7!

akuu ini kenapa sii??-_-"

mbuleeeeeeettt aeeee darii kemaren >.<

sampee curhat ke monyedh pun akuu sebenernya udah ngerti jawapannya gimana. tapii tetep aja akunya mbuuuleeett….kek Euler circuit…>.<

this is not of my regular act.

no, definitely not.

udahlah, toh udah tau sama tau.

lha terus? kalo udah tau sama tau, terus apa?
apa? apaa?? apaaa??? apaaaaaaaaaa……?????

*repetisiMenunjukkanKegundahanMendalam*

masa’ udah jalan sejauu inii, tiba2 kudu puter balik lagi..?

ehh tapii.. aku kok jadi ragu jugak ya,, ini bener nggak sih akuu udah jalan jauu?? apa jangan2 akuu nya aja yang "sok2an" ngerasa udah jalan jauh padahal ya cuman jalan ditempat sambil muterin tempat berpijak sebelomnya. hah?
hah??

JENG JENG!!

gimana ini?

-_-"

please help me God…

lagyan,,doanya manjur bet sihh..?!?!bisa nahan ampe berbelas2 orang kek gini…>.<

ampuuuunnnn……akuu nyeraaaaahhhh…rahh..rahh..raaaaaahhh………
m(_ _)m

"hello..?"
                                                       
"hi…"
                                                
I knew this voice, but was it him?, "Oh my God..,, Lance….?? .. I didn’t think it was you… it’s.. umh.. emmhh…" I stopped. I was overwhelmed, I was confused, but most of all, I felt this burst of relief that my mind became so full of datum to even speak a word more.
                                                          
"… mmm…" he went silent for a moment,  but I knew he was smiling just  a little. "So.. how are you doing? "
                                                         
"me? I’m.. well, I’m fine Lance, how are you??" I pushed my back and got up heavily with great effort.
                                                      
"I’m okay Alice, I’m doing well.. Hey, were you sleeping when I called?? Is this a bad timing?? I really don’t want to be a disturbance.." he talked a little faster.
                               
I looked at the time next to my bed. It was 2 AM.

"It’s two in the morning, dear. Of course I was sleeping. And.. hey, you knew I was sleeping!", I thought to myself.
                                                         
Had I not known him very well, I would’ve rejected his call and finished the conversation in the first place. But this is Lance. Lance wouldn’t call anyone at two in the morning with no good reason. And in this case, it had  better be a damn good one.

"No..no, it’s okay Lance. It’s such a sudden, though. It’s late.., what’s the matter??"
                                                   
"I just want to know how you’re doing. Are you alright, Alice? It’s been a long time.." he talked with a calmer tone. But a hint of anxiousness in his voice just couldn’t fool my radar.
                                                
"No, Lance. It’s not that simple. There must be something. Something that bothers you… what is it Lance? Is there something wrong??" as I spoke, I felt an increasing amount of worries. My heart began to beat faster as I waited for his reply.
                                                
"I told you Al, I was just wondering about how you’re doing there.."
                                             
"Lance, I know you. You’re a man of a manner. You don’t call anyone just to know how he’s doing at two in the morning." I paused and smiled, "tell me..what’s tangling your mind..?" I softened my voice.
                                                
"Hahaha.. Yeah, I can never fool you, can’t I  Al?"  I can feel that he’s smiling wider over there. "Umh.. I… umh.. " he stopped and continued with more concern in his voice, "Really, are you alright Alice…? Is everything fine with you or your life?"
                                                       
I’ve known Lance for more than 2 years. And we spent more than half of it as lovers. I wasn’t exactly the best person he can fool. This time is different, I just couldn’t get through his mind. But still, I also couldn’t help myself to smile about it. We’ve been separated for months, yet I can’t get him out of my mind. He was the best I could love, and to know that he still cared so much for me that he called so late just to know my condition, was a wonderful feeling to have. And somehow, beneath this long distance between us, I can safely say that he also still feels the same way. He’s there. And I’m there too. I never left his heart. I still stood right there where we left each other for good.
                                        
"I’m alright Lancey. I’m okay. I’ve got everything under control." I tried to make the most determined sound over my voice. But I thought I was rather hideous.
                                                       
He exhaled in relax. "Okay then. I truly hope everything is fine Al. If you ever need anything, just tell me and I’ll do my best. I mean it, Alice. I don’t want anything bad to happen to you." Oh great. There he goes again, talking in his most strong, willing and determined voice. Did they teach him how to talk tough in front of his ex back in those military academy??
                                                
"I’m fiiiineee Lanceeyyy…I really am… But what brought you this late…? You’re a soldier. A real gentleman. You don’t call a girl  this late for no reason Lance..What is………." suddenly something struck my mind. "Wait…"
                                          
"what Al?"
                                          
"You…. You weren’t getting any nightmare about me were you Lance?", "Nor any bad feeling??" yes. this must be the answer. He did this a few times when we were together. He just couldn’t wait any longer to make sure that I was alright.
                                             
"Hah…? Ahaha. Really, I just can’t fool you.",
                                                   
"Well, I think you better get back to sleep Al. It was late and it’s even later now. The dawn’s about to break. I hope everything is really alright. I’ll call you some other time, okay?" oh no. He’s also doing this again. He always speaks fast when he wants to finish a conversation to avoid hard questions. I couldn’t let him do this. Well, he got into a military academy almost a year ago and couldn’t make any contact with anyone outside his school except in special occasions when he gets his holidays. Last time we spoke was like 4 months ago, we didn’t make any contact since, and all of a sudden he called my cellphone like HUNDREDS of time very early in the morning, just to ask if I was okay??? uh’ huh. No sir. I’m not letting him getaway. ha’!
                                                 
"Heyy heyyy…Not so fast you silly.. You’re going to tell me right now the real reason why you’re calling!"
                                        
"Ahaha, no Al. You’re tired. I can sense it. Just go to bed, I’m sure you’re having a tough day today as you always are. So it’s better for me to end this and let the Sweet Princess goes back to her beauty sleep, okay? see you soon Ali.."
                  
"But..But.."
                               
"Bye Al..take care!"
                                       
Lance turned off the phone. Damn!! I hated when he does that. He gets away really fast and I just couldn’t say anything. Now I’m staring at my cellphone thoughtfully. What-if’s and What-for’s came to my mind rapidly that I started to feel a great migraine over the right part of my head. I thought about his voice, I imagined his face and how he smiled in between words, how he’d look at me when he’s concerned, and how I actually missed him a lot.. like hell. I thought and I thought.. until I fell to sleep in my sitting position……

to be honest, I’m not a really good chooser. I’m bad at choosing, especially concerning books. I always spend hours trying to figure out which book I really want to buy. don’t get me wrong, I know what I want. problem is, there are a hell lot of books viewing my passions. when I go to a bookstore I go straight in to novels and literatures, sometimes science and computers, and get stuck right in the narrow way between shelves. I can spend forever going through each pieces shelf to shelf. -_-"

                                                      

today I went to trimedia bookstore in SPI. this place is my heaven on surabaya, hahaha. it has a large variety of books from science to fashion magazine. as usual, I went straight to novels/philosophy.

                                                               

after almost an hour of scanning trough each row, I finally deliberated and fell for this book called "The Diamond of Drury Lane" by Julie Golding.

hmm.. after reading the first 40 pages, I think it’s a book worthwhile scanning a bookstore an hour long. but then again, what if I didn’t fall for that book and took something less indulgent? that’s why I think I really need to start organizing myself when coming to buying books.

                                                             

According to previous experiences when entering bookstores with an enormous range of books like kinokuniya, aksara, or trimedia, there are a few steps that might come handy for selecting the right books:

1. Know what I want/need

this is obvious. Books are like a miniature of the world. each piece you’re reading might take you so far and deep into its intriguing detail. and so it’s really important to know what you want, or what you need. DON’T distract yourself by turning into other sections no matter how interesting they seem to be. Go right up to your destination, whether it’s a textbook with heavy hardcover to protect it from the coffees you might spill when reading it in the middle of the night, or just a simple novel to serenade your tired eyes into dream.

                                                         

2. Scan scan scan!

this is the most ecxiting part of the whole thing. so you’re in the right section. what are you waiting for? start scanning! start scanning each books from one side of the bookshelf to the other.

                                                             

3. DO judge the book by its cover

for me, cover says everything. hell yeah. I won’t expect a book to be containing things about fish when its cover is entitled "The little black book of fashion" by Nina Garcia. -_-" . pick up book with the right title and book that looks interesting. I know, I know. cover doesn’t show anything. but then, how do you expect to know about the book when you’re not even interested by the look of it?? that’s absurd. take a good look at the cover, and flip to the back part of the book to see the review. some books don’t contain review nor synopsis on their back cover, they contain praises instead. this kind of books is a bit risky. I don’t get convinced easily just by reading those praises, so I put it back to the bookshelf rightaway. but remember, don’t stop! keep scanning.

                                                         

4. Go with your insting

since most Indonesian bookstores don’t let their customer read their books [they do this by covering them in plastic sheets that's not allowed to be torn open], you can only judge a book by three factors: book reviews [on the internet/tv/a friend/etc.], its cover, and last but not least…your feeling towards the book. whether it’s right for you or not. it’s true! on this process, I often feel like harry potter when shopping for his first ever wand: "the wand chooses the wizard" . hahaha. same thing here. the book chooses the reader. a quick scan through its cover gives you a brief explanation about the book, a friend’s review often come very subjective, but your feeling should well tell you whether it’s worth buying or not.

                                                         

5. Stay open-minded

sounds a kind of contradictory to the first step, but this is also important. once you get to the right section, there are still hundreds of books meeting your demand. after you’ve figured the right kind of book, options are available. you CAN’T stop at one book that you think already is "the one". open your eyes and mind! those other hundreds might also well be! if you find a book that ‘tickles’ you but doesn’t exactly cope with everything you were looking for, try to remember the identity of the book so that you can search for any handy information about the book. maybe you can come back next time for another piece?

                                                            

6. Book on a Budget

Oh puh-lease.-_-" this is the root of all problem: MONEY. money should be your big concern when buying books. Indonesian bookstores import books all over the globe, causing them to raise its price way above local books. when you feel like it’s the right book but the price is killing you, just put it back. knowledge shouldn’t be expensive. there are always alternatives. maybe you’ll find other book relating similar problems but instead of a hard cover, it’s wrapped in paperbacks. or maybe..the place is just not right for you. you can always try other shop. that’s okay.

                                                            

7. Alternatives!

this is the 21st century, people.. the world of digital invention. I’m talking about the internet -_-". e-books are also a great alternative if you can’t find it in the real world. or..you can also try shopping books online!

                                                   

hmm… I think that’s almost all. I’m pretty sure these steps should come handy [at least for me, haha.]

FYI, I’m now reading my "diamond" that I’ve just got earlier and really, it’s hard to stop reading it..>.< bye folks…! I need to start reading agaiinn…hohohohooo